Edging La Grande Mort
Let’s workshop this poem about a stimulant-fueled masturbation spiral where sexual excitement becomes so cerebral it threatens to wreak havoc on the rest of the body.
scent of the day: Interlude Man, by Amouage
Jeez, this one is legendary even if it does not speak to me like Epic Man and others in the Chong era. I am not up to releasing my thoughts today. It deserves effort I cannot give right now.
Edging La Grande Mort
Blood arousal sucked
skullward, away from half-mast cock,
over the chafed hour-plus
on the toilet—the terror
spike of realizing your hot cocaine fap
has had you conflating
mounting tachycardia
for mounting payload only propels
the sprint toward infarction.
"Edging La Grande Mort" is a visceral, unsettling poem that plunges into the dark, dangerous intersection of sexual obsession, substance abuse, and the very real threat of death. It functions as a **body horror lyric**, using explicit physiological details and psychological insight to depict a moment of intense, self-destructive indulgence. The poem's power lies in its unflinching portrayal of a highly taboo subject and the terrifying consequences of pushing one's body to its limits for a perverse pleasure.
Formally, the poem is remarkably compressed, achieving its intense effect through a dense concentration of highly charged vocabulary and a rapid, almost breathless rhythm created by enjambment. The title itself, "Edging La Grande Mort," immediately sets a grim, ironic tone, playing on the sexual practice of "edging" (prolonging arousal) and linking it directly to "La Grande Mort" (the "Big Death," a euphemism for orgasm, here twisted into actual death). The opening lines, "Blood arousal sucked / skullward, away from half-mast cock, / over the chafed hour-plus / on the toilet—" instantly establish the grim, solitary, and physically uncomfortable setting of this indulgence. The shift of blood "skullward" indicates a shift from physical sexual gratification to a more cerebral, dangerous high. The crucial turning point arrives with "the terror / spike of realizing your hot cocaine fap / has had you conflating / mounting tachycardia / for mounting payload only propels / the sprint toward infarction." This is where the grim reality shatters the delusion. The "hot cocaine fap" explicitly names the drivers of this dangerous act, while "conflating / mounting tachycardia / for mounting payload" reveals the fatal error in perception: the physiological signs of a heart attack are misinterpreted as signs of intensified sexual pleasure. The final phrase, "the sprint toward infarction," delivers the chilling, undeniable consequence, leaving the reader with a stark image of self-annihilation.
Thematically, the poem explores the dangerous feedback loop between addiction, warped perception, and self-destruction. The protagonist is so consumed by his "hot cocaine fap" that his body's warning signs of distress (tachycardia) are not only ignored but actively reinterpreted as a desirable intensification of pleasure. This highlights a profound **cognitive dissonance and a terrifying disconnect from self-preservation**. The poem delves into the psychology of extreme indulgence, where the pursuit of sensation overrides all rational thought and biological warnings. The "chafed hour-plus / on the toilet" underscores the degraded and isolated nature of the act. Ultimately, "Edging La Grande Mort" serves as a stark and unsparing warning against the perils of unchecked desire and the fatal consequences of misinterpreting the body's signals in the pursuit of extreme sensation, portraying a voluntary, terrifying rush towards an ignominious end.
sexual obsession, cocaine abuse, addiction, self-destruction, body horror, erotic horror, heart attack, tachycardia, physiological distress, warped perception, cognitive dissonance, taboo, self-annihilation, dark desire, warning, contemporary poetry.